Questions and Answers

Advice from Starwitch on Life, Love, Money, Spells, and everything else.

I Need a Revenge Spell for my Cheating Lover!

Dear Starwitch,

My boyfriend cheated on me and I am SO angry at him! Do you have a spell that I can cast on him to get revenge?

Julie

Dear Julie,

Performing revenge spells on other people is a spiritually immature act and only serves to prove that you are on the same low emotional and spiritual level as the person who you believe cheated on you. Please read my Free Spell Newsletter from September 17, 2006 to learn why he may have cheated on you in the first place and what you can do in the future to prevent that from happening again.

Only certain types of people attract cheaters into their life. Do you wonder what it is about you that attracts such people? I would venture to guess that this particular boyfriend is not the only person in your life who you feel has victimized you in some way.

You perceive yourself as a victim and therefore you become one. It's really quite simple once you understand the thought-energy behind it. I used to be a "victim" too, so I can very much understand how it feels to you.

Revenge will not fix anything. It will only keep you stuck in your victim mode. You need to improve your confidence and learn to appreciate yourself so that others can too. When you hear people say that you must love yourself before anyone else can love you, you probably think "that's crap" but it is actually very true. It may be difficult to understand, but think about it this way... Do you enjoy the company of miserable people, people who complain all the time, people who put you down or put themselves down? No, you don't. People like that are awful to be around. If you don't love yourself and enjoy your own company then you are probably one of those people, which means that no one else enjoys your company much either.

Like attracts like. If you are attracting people of a low emotional caliber then you yourself  are emotionally immature as well. I know it doesn't seem that way to you, but that is because you are lying to yourself and you believe your own lies. Nearly everyone does it and it begins in early childhood when you are first learning how to get by in this world.

Without getting into this too deep psychologically speaking, let me suggest that you put yourself on a course of self-improvement. The more emotionally and spiritually healthy you are, the better mates and friends you will attract. If you think things like, "all the good guys are taken", that shows that you have low self-worth. There are plenty of men available in the world. Think of the divorce rate! If you can never seem to find any good men, that means you need to improve yourself because the good men are not attracted to you due to your emotional deficiencies. It is imperative that you stop lying to yourself about your behaviors and true motivations if you are to ever be truly happy.

A good book that you can read to help yourself in the love department is Getting the Love You Want and Keeping the Love You Find by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. This book explains why we choose the mates that we choose and why they choose us. It's all done subconsciously and until you understand what is going on you will not be able to change it. This book is highly recommended by Oprah. "Getting the Love You Want" is a couple's guide and "Keeping the Love You Find" is for singles.

Love Spells