My mom........i've got a problem

rainysoul · Post by **rainysoul** » Tue Aug 25, 2009 5:14 pm

Atheist of peace wrote:It is not illegal for him to smoke. Illegal to buy sell or give him cigaretts, but damn it, he can smoke.

Yes it is, it's the same as underage drinking. Cops will give you a citation just because you are smoking, and not old enough to. I'd be happy to discuss it with you in another forum though, since that's not the purpose of this one.

rainysoul · Post by **rainysoul** » Tue Aug 25, 2009 5:19 pm

AfootFuzzball wrote: Well so far she's already told my dad that it's satanic( I already know how to argue that). I expect to hear her try to prove the bible right to me. Nomatter what I say she won't listen, that's just how she is. Back when I lived with her I went to a youthgroup because I had a bunch of friends in it and they did alot of fun things and didn't force the bible down your throat, she actually banned me from going there because they didn't believe EXACTLY what she does. She and my step dad had lunch with my old youth pastor to "discuss" this. Apparently they went and told him about how wrong his beliefs were, wouldn't listen to any of his points, and said he was a heritic. Then i was going to go to another youthgroup in the area, my step dad called the youthpastor, they had such a heated arguement the youthpastor had to stop writing his sermon because he was so pissed, then my mom lied and said she was the one to talk to him and that I wasn't allowed to go. I told her that my step dad is the one calling the shots because of all this and she said denied he even talked to the youthpastor.

Sounds like you're fighting a losing battle. Give it your best try though, then at least you know you tried. Like someone already said, you're old enough you don't have to see her anymore. Not an easy decision, but it is an option you have.

Post by **Whitewitchboi_235** » Tue Aug 25, 2009 7:16 pm

im really sorry for that, i wish all christians listened to jesus' words. the ones in red are important, and remind that a christians duty is to love and not judge, because that if for god, not us.

i am very glad that pastor is not here, i would have words for him, and then i'd have trouble remembering i'm not supposed to judge or hate!

Post by **Greymalkin** » Tue Aug 25, 2009 9:25 pm

LOL! Whitewitchboi, it really does my heart good to meet such an open minded and generally nice christian.

I've had some bad experiences in the past with christians but I'm really pleased to meet a nice one.

Whenever I read one of your posts I can't help feeling what a genuine person you really are. Your girlfriend is very lucky.

Post by **Whitewitchboi_235** » Tue Aug 25, 2009 9:45 pm

thanks, i try to be a good guy, it's hard sometimes. seeing people do things in gods name that's not for people to do upsets me, i want to apologize for people like that. my pastor says everyone who believes in jesus is saved the same, but sometimes i see what people do in his name and ask if they are really christian.

its hard to love everyone when they make themselves hard to love.

Post by **Greymalkin** » Wed Aug 26, 2009 4:55 am

Wasn't it Ghandi who once said, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Many of them are so un-Christ like".

Or words to that effect.

Post by **AfootFuzzball** » Wed Aug 26, 2009 9:18 pm

rainysoul wrote:
Sounds like you're fighting a losing battle. Give it your best try though, then at least you know you tried. Like someone already said, you're old enough you don't have to see her anymore. Not an easy decision, but it is an option you have.

Yeah, depending on how this weekend goes I probably won't go over there again.

Post by **Greymalkin** » Thu Aug 27, 2009 5:41 am

AfootFuzzball wrote:Yeah, depending on how this weekend goes I probably won't go over there again.

And that's the real shame in all of this, because despite your differences she's still your mother, and nothign should ever come between mother and child.

I really don't understand people who allow things (especially religion) to become between them and loved ones.

A relationship with another human being is real and tangible, a relationship with some 'god' is, at best, wishful thinking.

I will never understand people.

Post by **AfootFuzzball** » Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:45 pm

Greymalkin wrote: I will never understand people.

noone will.

Post by **AfootFuzzball** » Sat Aug 29, 2009 10:35 pm

I'm very surprised, it hasn't even come up in conversation yet and the weekends almost over.

rainysoul · Post by **rainysoul** » Sat Aug 29, 2009 11:17 pm

Maybe they decided its "just a phase" and that you'll grow out of it.

Post by **AfootFuzzball** » Sun Aug 30, 2009 10:11 pm

My guess is that it's because her friend spent the weekend at her house too and this is the kinda thing she'll talk in private about because she likes everyone else to think that everything's perfect and that her kids are good christians just like her. She did tell me though in the car about her "dream". Her friend nick(who's really quite) was trying to kill me and he was choking me. She said "god was telling her that I am addicted to nicotine and that it's going to kill me". This actually made me laugh.

Post by **Starwitch Stone** » Tue Sep 08, 2009 11:39 pm

Maybe you could just lie to her and say that you're not really practicing Wicca... that you just read a book about it and thought it was interesting and so you mentioned it to your sister and she blew it out of proportion. Tell her you're a Christian and that should satisfy her. Later, when you're 18, you won't have to deal with her opinions (hopefully) and you can do what you want. There's really no reason she needs to be all up in your religious business anyway. If you tell her what she wants to hear, she'll feel better and not have to worry about you going to hell. If she is a devoted Christian then the worst thing you can do to her is to tell her that you're not a Christian, since that would mean you're going to hell in her view. My mom knows I'm running a witchcraft website but I try not to bother her with the details about paganism too much since I know it would just worry her. Sometimes a white lie is best for all involved, especially when you're dealing with religious fanatics. Who needs the hassle of being honest with them?

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Bright Blessings,

Post by **Greymalkin** » Wed Sep 09, 2009 4:12 am

I see the point you're making but don't you see it as a bit of a cop out?
I've helped many young people with the coming out process with regards to their sexuality and they've often said similar to what you've just said above.

Of course it's always the individuals choice what they tell their loved ones but the thing about lying or not telling the whole truth is there's always the possibility that your loved ones will find out another way, and then they won't trust you after that and secondly, by lying about something it looks as if you're ashamed of your lifestyle somehow.

The truth may be a bitter pill to swallow but at least everybody's in the picture and nobody can accuse you of lying or being ashamed.

I understand we all only want to protect the feelings of our loved ones but the best course of action with anything like this is to be as honest and truthful as possible.
Ok, so they may be hurt and upset by it but the reality is if they choose to react like that then it's their problem, not yours.

Post by **WolfWitch** » Wed Sep 09, 2009 5:35 pm

Wow, gotts love that southern evangelical...

AfootFuzzball: I feel for you little brother. I too grew up around such and it is a chore not to let it get you down. I hope the weekend went blessedly quiet.

: That is a sneaky, dirty and underhanded thing to do. Warping his sisters words so she is esentually putting herself under the bus vice her brother... I knew I liked you. You think like me.

Greymalkin: Yes, it was Ghandi that said that. Can't remember when and where exactly but it is one of his more noted quotes (Among many many many more. Very prolific little man. The more my wife speaks of him, the more I realize I'm going to have to aquire his wisdom in book form so I can study on my own.)

Whitewitchboi_235: I swear, the more I read from you the more I come to respect you. I am one of those with whom Christianity left a very bad taste in my mouth so to speak. It is people like you, no, Christians like you, who remind me that those that I was forced to deal with for the most part are a minority and are not what "real" Christians are like. It's good to know that you are out there being a voice of reason for your respective faith.

I salute you.

WW>