I was really hesatent to read or reply to this post as I have had abad experiance involving a "Life after Death" conversation. It lead up to the last time I walked out of a church and the begining of the quest for what I realy believed. Seeing some of the answers in here however, has given me corage to post my own thoughts on this subject.
First off, SciFiChick: I think you hit upon a very important point when you said
I think one of the hardest things is to accept yourself the way you are.
It is easy to look at someone else and judge/accept them for whatever they seem or, if knowlage is gained, for what they realy are. It's never easy to turn that light on oneself. It's a very enlightening experiance to see yourself not as you normally would but as others do, or, even beyond that , see yourself in the light of absolute truth with no excuses or lies, even the ones you have told yourself. It hurts but you can learn a lot. Over the years I have had those lights turned to me at varying intencities, it was and remains, a point of reflection when I start to feel disconected from myself.
I think along some very similar lines as Elem. It's a belief that has evolved over the years as I have observed and pondered on what I have observed as well as theories that I have posed to myself because of these observations and ponderings.
I believe that the energy within us is the same as the primal energy of the universe itself. I know that Energy can't be destroyed or created. It just is. This tells me that the electricity and baser energy in me is the physical manifestation of that divine energy. As I travel through life, I learn, discover and experiance life in my own unique way, as does everyone else. This changes the paterns in my mind and as a result, the energies within it. When I die, this body will cease to contain the energies and as a result, it flows back to the universe becoming one with the everflowing field. Think of it as pouring a glass of water into a bowl containing more water. The glasses contents becomes one with the water in the bowl. I believe that, in that moment when you merge back to the universal flow, all sence of self disapear, as the glass's water looses itself in merging with the water in the bowl, it simply becomes more water. We become simply, more energy in the field. All of our experiances and knowlage flow out into the field, mixing and merging with other knowlage and experiances. Eventually, as a new body is formed in the material, a ceartain measure of energy is drawn into the body and becomes isolated from that field and forming an individual. A self. It's like drawing a glass of water from the bowl. Yes it's water, yes it's the same amount as was poured in, but it's not the same water. It may have a little of the same water but it is fundamentally different water. This is why, I think, that so many people can accuratly recall having been a ceartain person from the past. (like say, Napolean, just to pull a name from somewhere.) When you weed out the ones who aren't telling the truth, the ones left may all simply have a small amount of the energy that once made up the "self" that was Napolean. I have not dove into my past lives but I believe that I have, lurking in the inky depths of my mind, several distinct fragments of "others" thought's, experiances, and even opinions. I am fairly ceartain that a measure of the energy that makes up my "self" was at one time housed within a female. I have ceartain thoughts and rememberences of experiances that could only have been femenine. I believe their are other "fragments" in my minds depths but I have yet to solidly latch onto them.
I know one day, I will die. This is an inevatability. It bathers me, even scares me to an extent that this has to happen. But it's just a fear of the unknown. I know my theory, I know that it is based in sound theory and thought, I beieve it to be sound. But the fear is of the simple variable that I could be way wrong.
Beyond this fear, in the light of concious and rational thought, part of me is awaiting my after death experiance with a quiet anticipation. The thought of sheading my inhabitions and merging with what "is", no more wondering, or unanswered questions, no insecurities or fears. I almost can't wait to feel those weights lifted from my minds shoulders.
But these are simply my thoughts and beliefs. Take them as you will.
Blessed be to all those who seek.
WolfWitch.
The greatest advice I was ever given: It matters not what you believe. Only that you believe it wholeheartedly.