Love Spells - Opinions, Advice, and More...

[Starwitch]

Hi Everyone,

I've decided to put this topic about Love Spells here because of all the new members that always come in and ask for love spells. Everyone can add their opinion here about "free will" or you can post some love spells if you'd like or give whatever advice you feel is appropriate for someone asking for a love spell. This will stay at the top of this forum as a "sticky" topic because it's such a common question and I'm hoping that new members will read what everyone has to say about it before they ask us for a love spell.

Here is sample question you can pretend like you're answering if you need something like that to get you talking:

"I REALLY REALLY NEED a love spell quick! I have to make this person love me, because I love them and he/she is my soulmate."

or

"I need a spell to get my ex-boyfriend back. I know we are meant to be together. Nevermind that he dumped me and is probably dating someone else - I want him BACK!"

You get the idea. We get questions like this all day long here on the forum. It seems to me that if you're meant to be with someone then it'll happen without a spell and using a spell to force someone to love you will only make things worse in the long run because you will miss out on the TRUE love of your life and you'll be stuck with someone that doesn't really love you - they are only with you because you forced them to be. It's like emotional rape.

If you are NOT against love spells, feel free to post that too. I would really like to see all sides presented here so that newcomers can really get a feel for what witches think about love spells. You are welcome to post love spells here as well. There are also love spells on my web site. Here are a few good ones to try:

Manufacturing the Perfect Mate - Love Spell

Finding Your Soul Mate - Love Spell

Reveal What Someone Thinks of You

Spell to Find a Lover

There are many more for all different kinds of situations here on this page:

Free Love Spells

Opinions anyone? Feel free to post what you think about this issue.

Starwitch

[waterglyph]

Its funny that you posted this , because I read something the other night concerning this and was going to post it. So I'll just do it here. smileblu

These are a couple of tips for making "Wiccan-friendly" love spells from Elieen Holland, author of The Wicca Handbook (very good book by the way...).

** Invite attraction rather than compelling it.
** Put the matter into the hands of the Goddess. Cast a love spell or make a love charm, but make it contingent on her approval. Try adding a line to your workings like this:
"If you will it, make _______ mine."
** Remember that learning to love yourself is the best way to bring love into your life.

Another tip that I've heard is not naming a specific person in love spells (if you're not using the methods above), but trying to bring general energies of love into your life instead. (Keeps the "free will" business from getting messed up...)

And my personal tip is make sure you spend a little time thinking about why you want to do this spell. Scott Cunningham was always big on emphasizing the fact that spells should be done out of a need. A spell done out of need is one that you would not regret casting. One done on a whim, haste, or an emotional moment is often one you want to undo. *lol* So make sure that whatever spell you're casting is one you're willing to invest in for the long haul. And remember: most spells are way easier to cast than remove.

Anyway, this is just some stuff from a Wiccan standpoint. If you're not Wiccan, then go get 'em baby!

[Marie*]

I agree on what and Waterglyph have said. There are many love spells you can do to help bring the right one to you, but to do any love spell on a specific person is just in my opinion, immature. Love isn't about making someone love you or spells to bind them to you. It is way more powerful then that, and if there is someone that you are meant to be with the universe, the Goddess will take care of it for you. And if you don't care about free will then do be careful on what you are asking for, in two or three years, hell maybe even tomorrow, the right one could walk by you and you would have lost the chance, becasue you "knew" this other person is the one, and you made that person love you back. Oh, and you're not only screwing up the chance to be with the one you ARE suppose to be with, but also the chance for the other person to have true love as well. If this sounds like rambling I apologize, I just got off work and am heading to bed because I am sooooo very tired. Well that's my spin on things.

Marie

[JBRaven]

That is how happy I am with the above posts. I could not agree with you three anymore.

[5moons]

Yes but love spells can lead to so much worse. You are asking the fates to change your love life. Why? Love is all around us. You want to find that right person it will never happen. Even when you are married to someone are they really right. No cause you feel in love with them for who they are not what the spell did for you. A spell is messing with shit that you are not to. An love spells are the biggest mistake to mess with. I am sorry. I just believe that messing with the heart is the worst thing to do. You care that much and finding that right person for you is out there you just need to open up and see it.

[darkestlight*]

I totally agree with the above posts. I mean I think if you have to do a love spell to make things work, then they weren't going to in the first place. That means your messing with free will, and/or fate, which ever you believe in. And I dont know about you but I would not really wanna mess with either, So i say don't do love spells.

[waterglyph]

Well, the thing is though that once some people get their minds set on something no amount of warnings will keep them from doing it. All we can do is give the soundest advice we can to help and wish them the best. *lol* If not messing with certian kinds of spells is the life's lesson he/she has to learn, it will happen one way or the other. At the very least we've (hopefully) softened the inevitable's harsh hand...

[Starwitch]

That's a good point Waterglyph. I actually did want to hear both sides - people for and against love spells because I think newcomers need to hear what everyone thinks. I'm sure some people that are not opposed to love spells are hesitant to post though because of what all of us have said so far. But it's true that many people will go ahead and do their love spell regardless of what we tell them about it. But at least we have this thread here and when someone is about to post the inevitable question, hopefully they will read this first and we can spare them the typical lecture that they will get if they actually ask the forbidden question, lol.

Maybe we should post some of the "good" love spells here on this thread for people looking for that. There are plenty of them out there.

[Sarah]

Well, I don't actually believe in 'love' spells, per se. There aren't a whole lot of reasons to do love spells, unless you're actually seeking to strengthen an existing bond or heal a rift in a substantial relationship, open the lines of communication etc. You can not force an individual to show you true love. It might not exist within them, or it just might not exist within them for you, ever. What we're really talking is cursing or binding...You can attempt to bind a person to you or curse them to infatuation...It's an unhealthy, obsessive, and exhaustive process. In simple cases of rejection, short term flings naturally coming to an end, someone failing to notice you in the hallway between classes, someone ignoring your attempts to get closer to him....it's never going to work. Those are really rotten things, granted- call a girlfriend. Cry. Go buy yourself a new outfit. Change your hair. If you're thinking of keying their car, cutting their break lines, burning down their house...by all means curse them. It's better than going to jail in the short term. I did say 'short term' because if you've come up against a personality that brings out the worst in you, chances are you probably bring out the worst in them, or they're sociopathic, so it's smarter to steer clear. No amount of applied energy is going to bring about a healthy relationship with that person...Still, people are going to do what they want to do...If you have the will to bind someone to you, it's coming from a really unfriendly place- so don't expect a friend in return.

[Starwitch]

Good advice Sarah. It really is more like binding or cursing when you cast a love spell on someone who really has no interest in you. I think most of the time it won't work anyway, but if it did, it probably couldn't turn into any good.

[Blue Moon Princess]

I don't care for love spells, because even by softening the spell with the Goddess' will, you are seeking to manipulate another's free will or your own free will...very bad karmic energy, in my opinion.

But, I agree with Waterglyph that some of us must experience the result of a love spell as a life lesson.

I like to ask the Goddess to help me keep my heart open so that I am available to the opportunities to love others and to accept their love in return, whatever its form.

Do you really want that slimy boyfriend, who is a schmuck, to keep loving you? I think that too can be a life lesson. Are you denying the lesson you are in midst of learning? Like losing someone you care about, or learning the nature of love...good or bad? If so, you may invoke the 3 times law.

Debi

[hedge*]

Hmmmmmmm.....................................
this is a topic that I've debated time and time again ( both for and against ).

I just have a little question for everyone that has posted against love spells because they mess with peoples free will. What would you class another spell then, let's say for protection? You want to protect a friend or loved one, isn't your spell in doing this going against that persons freewill?

Just some food for thought.

Oh BTW, I am dead against love spells, but only for the reason that I think some things should be left to higher powers. Sometimes we should leave our fates in the powers that be.


hedge

[darkestlight*]

I usually only do protection spells when plain protection, wont be useful. And I ask you another question, how many people out there if offered the chance at protection would not take it, very few I think, so I dont really think it's messing with free will.

And if you want to go that way. Wouldn't it then be against free will to give someone choking to death the hymlic manuvere (sp?) because they have not given you permission to save there life.Just a thought.

I think love spells are wrong, mainly because what you are doing will more than likely harm you and them later.

[hedge*]

Yes it would be against their freewill, but so would the choking part be as well. We'd presume that that person would want to be saved from choking to death so someone would intervene and help them.


hedge

[Starwitch]

I don't have an issue so much with pushing your will on others. I've used banishing spells to get rid of people, and it certainly wasn't my place to change their life and make them leave, but I did it anyway and I don't care because they were a nuisance.

My main issue with love spells is that you are really messing up your own life (IF it works) by forcing someone to be with you who wouldn't have otherwise wanted you. You might have a soulmate out there that you are supposed to meet, but because you had a crush on "Joe" in high school and you put a spell on him, now you are married with 5 kids (Goddess forbid) and you go to the store one day and bump into your soulmate and you can't do anything about it because you are stuck with Joe now. That sucks. When people are in love, it's very hard for them to see that this particular person is not the be-all end-all and that there ARE other men/women for them out there and they'll get over this person in time. You really have to go through a lot of breakups (like I have) to realize that and trust that another person that is even better will come along in time, and that you will love them just as much, if not more, than you loved this person.