Confidence woes?

[springsgrace]

I wasn't sure if this is the right thread to post this in but basically I have zero confidence in any psychic or spiritual ability in myself, due to the fact I can't ground/centre or do any sort of those compulsory meditations.
It just feels like I am saying "I feel the energy in me" when I don't. I've tried basic grounding/centring both with and without a guided meditation multiple times and I feel nothing at all. This is really discouraging because it seems like most people are feeling the Spirit naturally without even trying. I'm not going to throw a tantrum about it, but it's just not fair.
I feel really connected and happy if I'm doing something practical, like someone said exercise would increase your fire element-based spirituality and that works quite well, and I write correspondence in my BOS and I make recipes and collect tools and garden plants but all of that is useless unless you can actually do magic and meditafe. Anyways, if anyone is or has been in a similar position, or has any tips for me, that would be great.

[Xiao Rong]

Hmm, I think I feel pretty similarly about how I practice magic. I've tried my fair share of "bubble of white light" exercises and breathing exercises, but they always seem a bit ... removed from me. In contrast, I seem to get the best results when I'm doing or making something tangible, like kitchen witchcraft or wire-wrapped charms ... perhaps that's the crafty Athena archetype in me expressing itself. And the meditation that works best for me is tai chi, which also has concrete effects on the body. I guess for me, as a panentheist ("God/dess is in the world"), I don't have much faith in a separate spirit world (since everything comes from the material world, there is no supernatural -- only natural). So I suppose it would have an effect on the kind of magic that works best for me -- things that are concrete and tangible in this world.

A lot of it also has to do with the fact that it SEEMS like everyone in the witchy/Pagan community are all doing certain things (e.g. meditating, grounding/centering, etc.), and when it doesn't come naturally to us, it feels like we're doing something "wrong". (in my case, I just have had zero experience with direct communication with deities, and if I'm being 100% honest, I am a little insecure about it). But that just ain't true; everyone has a different set of talents and strengths, and part of our spirituality is learning what those are and how to capitalize on them.