CreativeMind's Thoughts!

If you'd like to have your own blog here, start yourself a thread. Use your member name somewhere in the title so people will know who you are. The blogs here should be mostly about your spiritual path and beliefs.
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creativemind243
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Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by creativemind243 »

6-18-20

Hello everyone! I am writing today because I have much on my mind. You see, it's always been my dream to be a mother and have kids with my husband. It's something I long for even on my darkest days, and it's also something that helps to keep me motivated. I would love to be a stay at home mother and take care of my kids and my husband, and yes I know that sounds like I'm crazy to some people, but I am happiest when I am able to cook and clean and just be myself. I love preparing meals and cooking, making sure that household chores are taken care of, and things like that. It seems though, that lately I have been feeling like that's not good enough. I am going to college because I also want to earn a degree and be able to have a good job that doesn't involve retail or fast food, or even factory work. So I have chosen that instead of nursing, I want to be a teacher. Not only will being a teacher help me schedule wise when we do have kids, but teaching is something I have always enjoyed and it seems like the right choice for me.

For some reason, I feel like to some people that might not be good enough. And I understand that it's not a high paid job and it's not really anything as special as saving lives or helping those who are sick, but it does just seem like it's the right path for me to be on. So, no matter what anyone says or thinks, I am going to start doing what's best for me and my family, and not worrying about the rest. Getting my teaching degree will take 4 years of course, but that's not bad compared to some courses out there. And I am ready to start on my journey.

I feel like I wanted to be a nurse because it was what everyone else was doing, the money's good, etc. But honestly, I never had much of an interest in nursing or anything medical; it all just gives me anxiety and panic attacks, and honestly I don't know how to react when someone around is sick or has a medical emergency going on. So I think my best course of action is to do something I know I am going to enjoy that doesn't involve anything medical like needles or blood or surgery, and something I know will work out better once my husband and I do have kids. If those around me don't support it or agree with it, then of course that's okay, but this is what I feel in my heart is best for me, and this way I know I will have no regrets.

My plan is to go 2 years at a community college, and then another 2 years at a university. I am very excited for this opportunity, and can't wait to see where this journey takes me. I will, of course, do my best to make sure everyone is updated as I continue along this journey. Thank you to everyone for reading! <3
There is a battle of two wolves inside us; one is evil, It is jealousy, greed, and lies. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, kindness, and truth. The one that wins?
The one you feed.
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creativemind243
Posts: 68
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2015 5:15 pm
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Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by creativemind243 »

1-24-21

It has been a while, but as you can see, I do like to update every now and then on here. It makes it easy to keep a record of the things that happen throughout my life, as well as makes it easier to track my spiritual journey.

To update, I am still living with my in-laws. I do have a new job, but am currently quarantining due to covid-19. I am tired of the chaos that it feels like the world is constantly in, tired of the riots and the politics, tired of people constantly fussing and fighting amongst one another over things that I now know they will never agree on. It's hard to see families being torn apart at the seams, friendships ruined over petty quarrels, lives lost over one disagreement or another. I am tired.

I find solace, however, in my spirituality. I view the things that happen in this dimension as having little to no meaning now; the politics are man made, the disagreements are man made, etc. And this life does not last forever, and so I am calmed by the fact that I will not have to live this way forever, and I will not have to see the detrimental effects that man has caused on not only the world around them, but themselves.

I know that life has so much more to offer then what is just being shown now. There is so much more to life then working a job, making money, paying bills, having a family, retiring, etc. But it saddens me that these are amongst the only things that humans believe matter, and the only things that they work towards.

And I do realize that I am writing this as though I am not human myself, but I am human. However, I have come to realize that there is so much more to life and living then what those around us want to believe. And while I do want to have a family one day myself, I want to teach my kids that there is so much more then what is taught to them at schools, what they read online, see on the news, etc.

I hope that the next time I update, there will be happier news to share. But for right now, I am tired.
There is a battle of two wolves inside us; one is evil, It is jealousy, greed, and lies. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, kindness, and truth. The one that wins?
The one you feed.
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creativemind243
Posts: 68
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Gender: Female

Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by creativemind243 »

11-6-22

Hello everyone, it has been a while since I last updated here! There has been a big shift in my life; my husband and I are now living in a place of our own and have been since March. We both have jobs that pay decently and perhaps things in our lives are finally starting to take their shape.

An update to my Spiritual life and other things, I have to admit I was lost for a while. I no longer felt the need to do tarot readings and stopped practicing magic all together; it was as though life had lost all meaning, as you can see from my above post. I’m afraid I was in a dark place then, and it lasted a very long while. Things are better now; I’ve found myself once again wanting to get back into the practice of magic and divination, as well as wanting to go back to my roots and study more about Wicca.

I’m not exactly sure why it is Wicca has been calling me so heavily over the last few days, as I haven’t felt such a calling to it since I first learned of it many years ago. But everything has a reason, and if the Goddess is calling me then there has to be a reason for it. And so here I am, back at the very beginning where it all started. But I don’t see it as a bad thing; my mind was taken over by the sadnesses of the world, taking on way more then any single person should. So if the Goddess is calling me back, then I will slowly make my way to Her the best that I can.

I don’t see starting completely over as being a bad thing at all; if anything I see it as a way to start fresh and new; which I wholeheartedly believe is always a good thing. I imagine I’ll be spending a bit more time in this forum as well, and find myself being excited for this new journey.
There is a battle of two wolves inside us; one is evil, It is jealousy, greed, and lies. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, kindness, and truth. The one that wins?
The one you feed.
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Firebird
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Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by Firebird »

The season of Samhain is a good time for fresh starts, looks like you're right on cue! And I wouldn't think it is completely new or starting over, you already know what you know, right?, more like a re-bonding...spirit to soul. Peeling a layer to reveal a more in-tune version of yourself :fairy:
Bb, Firebird
“There are things known and things unknown and in between are the Doors.”
― Jim Morrison
“All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.”
― RWEmerson
:mrgreen:
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creativemind243
Posts: 68
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Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by creativemind243 »

10-2-23

Hello everyone! It's been almost a year since my last post here so I felt the need (as I do every year! :)) to give an update on things that have been happening this year in my life.

For the most part there aren't really too many new things that are new. We are still living in the same home (which is still so amazing!) and we are working. Really the only new thing I can think of is that my family and I have really drifted apart. There were some major things that went down over the last few months that was very eye opening for me and as such, there are family members I have since cut off. The holiday season is coming up shortly and I have made the decision that, at least for this year, I am going to keep to myself and distance myself from any get togethers or dinners that may be planned. This is only done as a protective measure because I let myself fall too deeply in the drama of others and as such, I have vowed to never let myself get sunk that low again, especially in drama that is not my own nor has anything to do with me.

But beyond that everything is pretty much the same, but of course there is absolutely no flaw in that. All around me though I can feel the weather changing; the air is cooler and the leaves are starting to change colors and I am so excited for the new season and of course, Samhain. I do hope all of you are having a good year and I can't wait to write another update sometime! I think about this forum often and how my first post now feels like absolutely forever ago, I like having at least one thing in life that is constant and consistent, and that is why I post here.

Until next time! Brightest blessings and happy almost Samhain! :flyingwitch:
There is a battle of two wolves inside us; one is evil, It is jealousy, greed, and lies. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, kindness, and truth. The one that wins?
The one you feed.
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creativemind243
Posts: 68
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2015 5:15 pm
Gender: Female

Re: CreativeMind's Thoughts!

Post by creativemind243 »

12-31-2023

Hello! It hasn't been too long since my last update but since I found myself browsing the forum I decided I would write something. The new year is almost upon us and I have thought a lot today about some things I would like to accomplish in 2024.

1. Read at least 20 books this year! In 2023 I have read 19, with my goal being 25. So for 2024 I decided to set one that is a bit more realistic and one I should have no problem reaching.
2. I'd like to build my own PC this year. It's something I've wanted to do for the last few months but have lacked the funds to do so; my goal is to have my own PC built by the end of the year!
3. Become more spiritual. This is definitely something I would like to do in 2024, as I have found myself drifting away from my spirituality and becoming more drawn into things that lower my vibration. I want to change that in the new year.
4. Start shadow work. This one might be a bit tougher, as I have a lot of past trauma and things that I have pushed down and haven't thoroughly dealt with. I'd like to begin the journey of working through that trauma and finding out more about myself.
5. Let go of people and things that no longer serve me. This one is also going to be tough; but I have come to realize that some of the people I have surrounded myself with are not, well, good for me and they do not have my best interest in mind. It's time that I work on letting those people go and moving on.

I hope to be able to write updates about how the year goes and how I work to accomplish these goals. Until next time, brightest blessings! <3
There is a battle of two wolves inside us; one is evil, It is jealousy, greed, and lies. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, kindness, and truth. The one that wins?
The one you feed.
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