Alcoholic Family Member - So Much for a vacation

[Oddball]

A family member of mine is drinking -again. I'm thoroughly tired of making sure they don't fall down the stairs or drive the car. I've lost most of my sympathy and love for this person I used to respect. Now I'm going on vacation with them, out of state, for a week. I honestly just want to cancel my tickets and stay home, away from them, but that would mean that my other family members would be with them. They're not in danger of abuse from this person, but I'd still feel guilty. I finally lost it when I got off for a peaceful Labor's Day weekend, only to hear them hiccupping and talking in that goddamn loon voice again. I've just been under a dark, seething cloud of anger for the rest of this week. What a waste.I am DONE. I am lost. I want out so BADLY. I'm looking for an apartment, but the vacation is moot. What the hell am I going to do?

[SnowCat]

You can't take care of the world. Take care of yourself. I would cancel the tickets and stay home. Spending the week taking care of an alcoholic is not a vacation.

Snow

[RosieMoonflower]

I'm so sorry. I know dealing with a family member who has addiction can be very hard. I'm currently trying to get my father to agree to go to rehab. Some addicts have to hit rock bottom before they get better. Don't let them take you down with them. Sending positive light your way.


Rosie

[Firebird]

Now I'm going on vacation with them, out of state, for a week. I honestly just want to cancel my tickets and stay home, away from them, but that would mean that my other family members would be with them. They're not in danger of abuse from this person, but I'd still feel guilty.

Does this person drive? Maybe you shoud go just to make sure they are not driving your loved ones around.
Then check into this: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/international-meetings

I'm really sorry you are dealing with this, if they could only understand how their behavior is undermining our feelings for them
First and foremost, take care of yourself.
Bb, Firebird

[Oddball]

Just wanted to thank everyone for all the kind responses and helpful advice. I ended up going on the vacation, but they were on their best behavior. No major drinking. They still struggle with it, even after we returned home, but I've started seeing a therapist. I'm trying to figure out how to move out on my own and afford an apartment. That is an adventure unto itself!

(On a lighter note- happy Samhain!)

[SnowCat]

Sounds like your taking some good steps for yourself.

Snow

[smogie_michele]

I relate to you very much- my father was/still is an alcoholic and drug user. Family vacations were often a gamble for us. I'm glad things went smoothly and very,very glad that you have been going to therapy. I talk to a professional regularly and I swear it has saved my sanity