Abuse and Abusive relationships..........Help

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Eretik
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Abuse and Abusive relationships..........Help

Post by Eretik »

Hedgewitch said we could make a sticky thread on Abuse.I have several sites with resources and advice,lined up. It is really important that we can direct victims to practical help, also that we can help with the surrounding issues of control and the whys and wherefores,of how the abusive partner plays on the victim psychologically and emotionally, I know we are here to offer support and often just being believed and listened to can make all the difference,magickal bindings and techniques are useful too,but we need to be pro-active on this issue,in practical terms. This isn't just for love relationships but for all kinds of abuse, whether it's group bullying -School/work, or family abuse or any of the many forms. All resources/information/advice posts would be welcome. Many of us here are survivors and have considerable understanding of the difficulties experienced,we will never judge a seeker,so please anyone out there reading this who is suffering - it's safe to talk here,we do know how you feel.Do not suffer in silence.


http://www.recovery-man.com/abusive/abusive.htm

http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/re ... abuse.html

http://www.bbc.co.uk/relationships/dome ... ndex.shtml

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abusive_relationship

http://geocities.com/conscioustar/writing/abusive.html.

All these pages have further info.and links attached for help/resources,try to read as much as you can - you will recognise yourself and the abuser in this info. When I did that,it made me feel less alone -that is important.
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

More sites,as before all or most have help nos. attached. I am trying to find information for US,Canada and UK, mostly.If you need resources for somewhere else and can't find what you need -let me know,I 'll help all I can. I am putting up sites for men,children,everybody, abuse takes many forms - and it's shamefully common. Any one with info./resources please get them up here,anything I 've missed?


http://www.bullyonline.org/related/abuse.htm
this site has a wide ranging coverage of bullying and abuse,in lots of it's forms.

http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/yourchild/sibabuse.htm
abuse by siblings[brothers and sisters]

http://www.abuse-survivors.org.uk/index.html
has hotlines for US and Australia,as well as UK.

http://www.menstuff.org/issues/byissue/abuse.html
for men

http://www.psychiatric-abuse.co.uk/
Institutional abuse[I am looking for US etc.resources too]

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_a ... eglect.htm
for child abuse

http://www.popan.org.uk/index.htm
institutional abuse

http://www.4woman.gov/violence/
for women in US

http://paulwilliamsconnection.org/women.htm

http://www.ndvh.org/navigation.php
America,violence hotline.

http://www.womensaid.org.uk/
UK,violence hotline.

I am looking for LGBT,resources too and will put more up later.
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Peregrine
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Post by Peregrine »

I'm definitely taking notes on one of these sites addressing workplace bullying. There are more blatant applications from my previous place of employment (and where my husband is still trapped for now) than I can shake a stick at.
It's like walking down an empty street, listening to your own footsteps. But all you have to do is knock on any door and say, "If you'll let me in, I'll live the way you want me to live. And I'll think the way you want me to think." And all the blinds will go up, and all the doors will open, and you'll never feel lonely. Ever again.

~Henry Drummond, "Inherit the Wind" (1960)
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

I'm still looking for more information on all forms of bullying and abuse, I hope what's there is helpful so far. I will add more as I have time.We need to stand up for each other and support each other in all this - it goes on too much,it's everywhere and society as a whole needs to make changes. This is my 'crusade' -it's close to my heart. I get very upset and angry about this.in all it's forms.
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

REASONS NOT TO KILL YOURSELF

because you deserve to live
because your life has value, whether or not you can see it,
because it was not your fault,
because you didn't choose to be battered and used,
because life itself is precious, because they were and are wrong,
because you are connected to each and every other abuse survivor, and so your daily battle automatically gives others hope and strength.
because you will feel better, eventually,
because each time you confront despair you get stronger .. you can't know now what you will ultimately be able to do with this new morsel of strength, what future battles you will be able to win,
because if you die today you will never again feel love for another human being, or trust, or gratitude,
because you will never again see kindness and compassion in another's eyes
because if you die today you will never again see sunlight pouring through the leaves of a tree, or a bird take flight, or feel the quality of light in winter,
because the seconds do not cease their passing, because even if it feels like time has become an unbearably heavy stone, it has not, and you only have to endure,
because you have already won .. you have known the cleverness and resiliency and courage and stubborn will to make it this far, and no one can take that away,
because the will to live is not a cruel punishment, even if it feels like that at times: it is a priceless gift.
because your inner children need you, they have no one else and their need is so great, and because they deserve more than anyone to be healed and comforted, they are true heroes against impossible odds.
because you owe your inner children, they are the reason you are here. If you die today you will erase the meaning of their suffering and incredible endurance, and that is too great a loss,
because you already have the skills to find your healing path, you have proven this over and over again,
because we need more warriors against this evil,
because we need survivors to offer testament against this horror and despair,
because no one knows better than you the meaning of suffering, and the agony deepens the heart,
because you deserve the peace that will come after the battle is won, and it will be won, but only minute by minute - we must learn to let go of the unconquerable,
because we can all come together in later years to laugh in their faces,
because we will be able to show them that even though they had all the power and strength and ruthless cunning, even though we were only helpless, innocent dependent children, we will have beaten them at the game they so smugly thought they had mastered,
because I am furious that we have to suffer the pain of another's evil and filth
because you too will one day feel fury,
because it is critical that you survive.

....by Mari Collings



A profound statement.Powerful thoughts. I emboldened one which is very important.

here is the site I took this from-

http://www.stardrift.net/survivor/index.html
kai
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Post by kai »

I am not a victim of abuse, but still reasons to live. I dont even have words. Thanks a million eretik :) .
[Kai]
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

This was posted on another forum I use.The members were trying to dissuade someone who is suicidal,I hope it has helped,we are still waiting.I had to bring it here - it resonates powerfully.I am glad this sticky is helping people. Feedback is fantastic.Remember people - all testimony,ideas and thoughts go a way towards helping others -it helps to know you are not alone,that others understand.
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

Any sense of despair and hopelessness and the fact you get past it, counts as surviving,whether it is from abuse or other sources - you are worth it Kai, we all are.Keep fighting on.
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

Another resource page for suicidal people. Matter of fact advice and practical help.A good site.



http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
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Peregrine
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Post by Peregrine »

Eretik wrote:This was posted on another forum I use.
Can I ask which other forum this is?
It's like walking down an empty street, listening to your own footsteps. But all you have to do is knock on any door and say, "If you'll let me in, I'll live the way you want me to live. And I'll think the way you want me to think." And all the blinds will go up, and all the doors will open, and you'll never feel lonely. Ever again.

~Henry Drummond, "Inherit the Wind" (1960)
JBRaven
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Post by JBRaven »

These word have helped me more than anything Ihave ever read before.

Silecnce=Death

Abuse hurts more people than the ones getting abused. I have years of understanding this and I have relized that abuse stains us all.
kai
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Post by kai »

I still dont get it, how can anyone even sleep at night by hurting someone. Even i say some bad words at time when i am really mad, but i need to apologize, else later when i calm down, i will be thinking about it on and on.
[Kai]
Revolpathon
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Post by Revolpathon »

some people just lack a "switch" in their minds i think

it's a known fact some get aroused by having the whole "power play" going on
Eretik
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Post by Eretik »

The other forum is 'occult forums' - not normally a place known for it's kind hearts.lol. Suicide is a hot topic at the moment. I know many people are horrified by the idea, but suicide is not a sin,it's a human state of despair. It worries me that so many have reached this state ,especially recently.A sign of the times we live in?
Eretik
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