The Dank Cave of the Air Panther
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Risingpanther
- Posts: 87
- Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 9:18 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: In the library, researching something random.
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Risingpanther
- Posts: 87
- Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 9:18 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: In the library, researching something random.
Sometimes I wonder if anyone even reads these things, or if Im just posting them to get things off of my mind. Either way, for the few that may (or may not) be interested, I will continue to do so.
When i say school is insane, it is an understatement. I come home with an average of 4 hours of homework PLUS, along with various competitions and a metric shit-ton of resposibilities for various projects. My fossils project for Science Olympiad alone has taken over 90 hours to complete, with plenty of time to eat my soul in the future.
Ive been trying to find time to practice and to celebrate my faith, and it gets hard. I made a wishing well for my room to do quick-magick for when I dont have time for ritual, and try to pray daily when I dont get time to meditate. It feels like a bit of my soul is missing, because of the time-crunch issue, and how fitful my sleep has become when it does come. I am slightly worried, and irritated my expiriments with fossil totem animals and the completion of my new "tradition's" (if you wish to call it that, my own system for practice) book of shadows...which has been a labor of love for quite some time now. I feel like a medley, with my practices...there are so many things I have read and been told that dont feel right to me, and Ive been trying to build my preferences into my practice while staying true to my pagan and Wiccan origins. Its exhausting really...
I have become obsessed with natural magick however, and I have been itching to practice, which is adding to my frustration. I also have learned a great deal about magickal timing and have been desiring to write up an intro on it for the tips/advice portion, maybe even in the new witches section. I might revive the weight-loss program from the dead as well, if you all will have me. Those who still want readings, I will try to get to them, but I am insanely busy. I can try, but no guarentees.
Many blessings to you all, and much love from your friendly neighborhood feline!
When i say school is insane, it is an understatement. I come home with an average of 4 hours of homework PLUS, along with various competitions and a metric shit-ton of resposibilities for various projects. My fossils project for Science Olympiad alone has taken over 90 hours to complete, with plenty of time to eat my soul in the future.
Ive been trying to find time to practice and to celebrate my faith, and it gets hard. I made a wishing well for my room to do quick-magick for when I dont have time for ritual, and try to pray daily when I dont get time to meditate. It feels like a bit of my soul is missing, because of the time-crunch issue, and how fitful my sleep has become when it does come. I am slightly worried, and irritated my expiriments with fossil totem animals and the completion of my new "tradition's" (if you wish to call it that, my own system for practice) book of shadows...which has been a labor of love for quite some time now. I feel like a medley, with my practices...there are so many things I have read and been told that dont feel right to me, and Ive been trying to build my preferences into my practice while staying true to my pagan and Wiccan origins. Its exhausting really...
I have become obsessed with natural magick however, and I have been itching to practice, which is adding to my frustration. I also have learned a great deal about magickal timing and have been desiring to write up an intro on it for the tips/advice portion, maybe even in the new witches section. I might revive the weight-loss program from the dead as well, if you all will have me. Those who still want readings, I will try to get to them, but I am insanely busy. I can try, but no guarentees.
Many blessings to you all, and much love from your friendly neighborhood feline!
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Risingpanther
- Posts: 87
- Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 9:18 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: In the library, researching something random.
Bloody hell, It's been a long time. I came back because I got emails reminding me that I was wanted here, and gods above I needed the reminder. I have been extremely depressed and having a rough time, with abusive parents and being kicked out, house jumping, and losing the man I literally pledged my life to. I didnt marry him, I bonded him at his request. Now Im bloody regretting it.
I graduated (woot!) and turned 18 saturday...and of course no one remembers. Whatever. Im f*cking exhausted and I dont know what to do. On top of it, I have lost many of my friends due to the aformentioned guy. What do I do? I hate people...
This is where my misanthropic tendancies come to the surface, and my need to serve the pagan community remedies it. Sort of. I dont know whether Im in the right mind for readings, but I can try. I can bloody try, and itll take my mind off of things. Gods know, I havent touched the cards in an issue not related to him in who knows how long. I feel like Im lost, and drowning. But I have to survive. There is too much at stake. I dont know if anyone is reading this, but those who are, I beg of you: keep me in your prayers.
The storm has only begun.
I graduated (woot!) and turned 18 saturday...and of course no one remembers. Whatever. Im f*cking exhausted and I dont know what to do. On top of it, I have lost many of my friends due to the aformentioned guy. What do I do? I hate people...
This is where my misanthropic tendancies come to the surface, and my need to serve the pagan community remedies it. Sort of. I dont know whether Im in the right mind for readings, but I can try. I can bloody try, and itll take my mind off of things. Gods know, I havent touched the cards in an issue not related to him in who knows how long. I feel like Im lost, and drowning. But I have to survive. There is too much at stake. I dont know if anyone is reading this, but those who are, I beg of you: keep me in your prayers.
The storm has only begun.
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Risingpanther
- Posts: 87
- Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 9:18 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: In the library, researching something random.
GAH! I seem to have the worst luck. I had been hous jumping pretty much up until October, then moved back out to WA, where I started, and am trying to keep down a job...lost the seasonal one I had at Target and have been barely making the 300 I need every month for rent. I have been considering opening up my Tarot business for money for over 3-card readings, but I need stable internet for that and right now Ive been using the library computers. I am exhausted and am frustrated that due to where I am staying practicing my faith beyond prayer is a big fat nono...I have no clue what I am going to do. I hope that everything will work out though, and I am prayign that I can do my service to EUTM more faithfully now. Im contacting everyone who posted on my board who did not get a reply and asking them if they want one and if so posting, if not deleting the request so I can start anew. Hopefully my clean slate will work out better this time, Gods willing...
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Risingpanther
- Posts: 87
- Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 9:18 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: In the library, researching something random.
Nathan, my boyfriend, and I, are on the rocks. Again. Im starting to wonder what will happen to us as we fight more and more and he seems to enjoy my company less and less...even though I would kill for him. I dont know what to do. I opened up my tarot business and I hope that this job Im holding pans out, but yet again my life gets f*cked over...I didnt get my first paycheck today like I was supposed to, so I am $300 short what I shouldve had in pocket. Everyone is mad at me, and telling me I need to find a new job, but I feel at home in the one Im in. People like me there. I have friends, friends who are alot older than me, but friends. I wish there was more I could do...