Best Way to Celebrate the Sabbats and Esbats?

[raynelae]

Hello I really need everyone's help. I feel confused about just how to celebrate the Sabbats and Esbats. Rituals sometimes leave me feeling cold afterwards and I want to know if I'm doing something wrong. I sometimes hate doing my rituals inside..but honestly, it's hard for me to feel completely comfortable outside in the dark doing a ritual. I feel like I need something less structured. The Pagan part of me rather than the Wiccan part screams less ritual more celebration, but I feel guilty if I don't perform a ritual..almost as if I've let the Gods down. I try to incorprate more than just ritual into the sabbats and esbats, and I do so with success. But sometimes I find it hard to get into a ritual state of mind after a stressful day at school. I feel horrible when I'm not doing my best spiritually and that is how I feel now. I apologize for my rant and I ask for any help you have.
Blessed be.

[Firebird]

Hi Ray...Try not to push yourself so much, you have taken on a lot this year and it will take some time to sink in. Soon it will be second nature, and you will be able to flow with it more easily.
Some feel the the Sabbats are strictly for celebration and that any magical work should only be done at the Esbats. I think it is a matter of personal preference and need. If you need the energy of fertility to jump start a project, then you could do a working at Bealtaine, Monday, or at the new moon. If you wish to end some bad energy, banish it into the dark half of the year, Saturday, Samhain or at the dark moon. You in need of an extra chunk of change? Then Litha or the full moon or any Sunday. In addition...if you have an immediate need of anything, and the correspondences are not lining up for you...do the work any way...it may take a little longer, or it may not flow easily or well, but still, you have set that magical energy forth.
As for the dark and the out-of-doors, some things can be done in the daylight, and maybe preferably so...but if you feel you need the dark, try to streamline your rituals or do small offerings of flowers or incense instead of full fledged ritual ...acknowledging the elements, as well as the Lord and Lady without necessarily calling them in. Of course in the winter you may have to move indoors anyway, eh?
Let me know if this makes sense, or maybe I could help with other ideas later...Blessings Ray!, Firebird

[raynelae]

That works ..thanks. A lot of the times rituals are nice but at the same time I feel so cold afterwards. Can I pm you about something Firebird?

[Firebird]

Sure Ray you can pm me anytime. I wondering if this coldness you are experiencing is because you have been celebrating solo? I know you have been trying to find others on your path, and it has been hard. The joy of the seasons are best spent with folks that feel the same way as you. I may have had similar feelings, after I had been practicing for a few years, and I felt...I need to get others in my yard, to share this wonderful garden I have built (planted). But then there is benefits to working alone as well. OR, I also have this feeling of sadness that not more people realizing the sacredness of the Earth. The other thing that has left me feeling empty, is not wanting to leave the circle,...that once your Rite over, I'm like whaaaa it's over, I was so much more happy or comfortable in the circle. Blessings, Firebird

[raynelae]

That's exactly how I feel...lonely and sad. People might accept your religion but unless they're actually a Pagan you can't really talk to them about how you feel spiritually because they don't understand.

[raynelae]

Well..I figured out my problem. Not enough variety! I've done the same esbat ritual for about four months and I'm a bit too stirct with myself for the Sabbats (after all, they're supposed to be more loosely celebrated.) So, I'm going to start working around my school and start holding my Sabbat celebrations at least on the weekend following or prior to a sabbat so I won't feel stressed with time...I'll have time to attune with the earth and do crafts specific to each Sabbat this way. And for the Esbats..I'm going to start holding a Full Moon ritual attuned to each different season. A different one for the fall, winter, spring, and summer. And do some different things for each esbat. I'm also going to work on taking more time for my relationship with the Goddess and try to pay more homage to the God. (take it from me, it's best to have both. Otherwise, you'll feel unbalanced.) just thought I'd let everyone know I worked this out